Yes. The answer is an emphatic YES! I have battled depression for years! Contributors to this disease, such as poor stress management skills, send me down a spiral. Life comes at me all at once and it is difficult to handle the blows. There’s always an attempt to do better and “push through” the pain, until I am worn out from fighting. Legal battles are the absolute worst! Coparenting is hard! And yet, the fires keep resurfacing.
What do you do when it is just too much?
I recently opened up about my inability to help my son with a particular church project because of the headspace I’m in. Completing this work has been an uphill battle and until I get better, these extracurricular tasks won’t get done. I value this spiritual outlet he is a part of. I’m just tired of being Superwoman. The cape is down. I have nothing to prove.
Being a flawless parent is impossible. I won’t get it right all of the time and that is ok! Transformational Coach, Lisa Nichols speaks about giving from your overflow. This concept drastically differs from the common belief to serve from a full cup. The fullness of your cup is for you-your peace/your mental health/ your sanity. The overflow is for everyone else-kids, husbands, friends, etc. Don’t put yourself in a rut by giving all that you’ve got in your cup, as there will be nothing left for you. This type of service is unhealthy.
Take care of you. How does that look?
- Walking for a few minutes out of your lunch break.
- Painting your nails.
- Getting your eyebrows done.
- Acknowledging your accomplishments (however small).
- Breathing deeply.
- Envisioning a better life (in detail.)
- Watching and/or listening to inspiration material.
- Going out with friends.
- Dating! (You’re still sexy. Embrace the love.)
- Setting boundaries.
On a side note, I’ve been entertaining prospects lately and it feels good to be noticed (and not objectified). But, that distinction comes with setting boundaries. Now, there are men who will sexualize you even when you uphold your standards. However, we have the power to draw lines in the sand as to what guys come in our space (mentally and emotionally.) I feel like these dating tips are a post within themselves. Before I digress, let me drive the point of prioritizing your wellbeing.
- How are you feeling (really and truly)?
- Can you reach out to a friend/confidante/pastor/leader?
- Do you have a tribe? (If not, this blog can be your support group.)
- Are you happy?
- Are there people in your circle who drain you?
- Can you weed out the dead weight (be it people, places or things?)
- Where are you spending the most of your time and with whom?
These starter questions can help you rake through the muck. For more assistance, email me. I’d love to keep in touch.
Until next time…