I don’t allow other people to define me. What you think of me can actually be a combination of your observations, prejudices and perceptions. Insecurity and false narratives may be mixed in there too. With that said, why would I internalize what you think about me? How does that serve me? How much more empowering is it for me to define myself by my own standards, morals and belief systems?
No one’s approval can validate or negate who I am. I have been called derogatory names, lied on and manipulated. A weak or vulnerable mindset can internalize this toxicity and quite frankly, I’ve fallen victim to this myself. However, I am here to tell you no one has that power over you, unless you give it to them. Please know you have the authority to take your power back!
This resurgence of power comes into play with domestic violence as well, where one party exercises control over the other through mental, physical and/or emotional abuse. It is never ok to dominate another human being. (And, for those parents who are immediately justifying force over their children, we are taught to “train up a child” not to dominate them). Children are gifts from God, who yes, need correction and direction, not force. This is why it is so important to help them (and ourselves) formulate a healthy mind that encourage individualized thinking, apart from the manipulation and/or coercion from another person.
Going further into how we define ourselves, lies the concept of identity. How we choose to show up in the world ties into our core values-the foundations of self. Who are you at your core? Kind? Personable? Strong-willed? Caring? What is important to you? What bothers you? Answers to these questions ultimately lead you back to yourself.
Who you are at your core (in your purest form) is who God created you to be-a perfect specimen that has unfortunately been tainted by life’s junk, pain, remorse and drama. But, once we rake through all of that mess, a precious jewel arises. We are precious in God’s sight and no one can take that away from you.
Woman. How do you define yourself? Who has God called you to be? Essentially, the question asks, Where is your identity? Then and only then can you draw conclusions as to who you are. If you obey God, you are the head and not the tail, above and not beneath. (Deuteronomy 28:13)
Personally, I identify as a woman who is powerful, confident, sexy, beautiful, attractive, smart, and brave. I am who God created me to me to be.
What is your personal definition? Comment below.